I need web developer because
when I was told I needed a solid back end I started to do squats.
I need website because
even hipsters don’t like my smoke signal call to action
I need web design because
I still think Comic Sans is a fun font choice.
I need website because
leaving my number on public restroom walls is attracting the wrong type of clients.
I need web developer because
I thought a site map was what Google Maps used.
I need web developer because
I didn’t know there was HTML2 through 4.
I need web developer because
my server told me I needed support so I tied a rope to it.
I need web design because
my GIFS look like Jiff….peanut butter.
I need web developer because
I thought PHP was something you got with a prescription.
I need website because
“contact me” link in my PDF goes to “mailto: insert email here”
I need web design because
I thought a GUI was what came out after squishing a buggy.
I need web design because
I need website because
my #GiveMeMoney was taken over by a kickstarter
I need website because
404 Error isn’t a problem with my fax machine.
I need web developer because
my hyperlinks are the same color as my body text and I can’t even find them.
I need web design because
I thought Wordpress was how they printed newspapers.
I need website because
my DVD presentation was called “retro”
I need website because
when showing product images to a client on my phone he swiped to many times and saw my nude beach selfie.
I need web design because
the colors I chose don’t cause screen bleed but more screen screams.
I need web design because
my pop up boxes just say “No.”
I need web design because
just putting fields to enter your credit card details doesn’t constitute a website to some people.
I need web design
because I think auto play website music is still a good idea.
I need web developer because
when asked for my logo RGB I said “I don’t have any.”
I need web design because
there are so many pop ups on my current site I can’t find the actual page.
I need web design because
my website has been “Coming soon” since Bush was in office.
I need web developer because
I thought CMS was a cable channel.
I need web design because
flaming text from CoolText isn’t working like it did in 2001.
I need website because
I tried a TV Ad…..to target Netflix users.
I need website because
I can’t remember my geocities login.
I need website because
I sent a link in an email to a file I had on my desktop…and it didn’t work.
I need web design because
I can’t find the drop shadow in MS Paint
I need web developer because
I thought cell padding was what scientist did to DNA.
I need web developer because
my client database is still a rolodex
I need website because
“trust me” isn’t cutting it when my clients want to see the product.
I need website because
someone wanted me on Periscope and I don’t own a submarine.
I need web developer because
I thought HTML was an abbreviation for Hamilton Airport
I need web developer because
someone asked me about Drupal and I checked to see if my fly was open.
I need website because
“find me on the wind” isn't acceptable anymore. It used to be cool
I need web design because
my Flash site called me “out dated”
I need web developer because
I thought imbedding a twitter feed meant putting fresh newspaper in my bird’s cage.